Tactics of Manipulative People
18 Mar Psychologist Mary Casey, author of How to Deal With Master Manipulators, says these kinds of people are hard to recognise because they are doing just that: manipulating you. "Openly If you are feeling unhappy at work and you can't put your finger on why, think about the people you deal with. Is there. 5 Jul Emotional manipulation is rampant in many workplaces. The main aim of a manipulator is to influence and control the action and behavior of others. 1 Jun Here are eight keys to handling manipulative people. Not all of the tips below may apply to your particular situation. Simply utilize what works and leave the rest. For more in-depth tools on how to effectively handle difficult individuals, download free excerpts of my publications (click on titles) "How to.
Having a company meeting on manipulative behaviors may help others spot and report problems. People deal with all kinds of pressures at work: Another pressure comes in the form of employee manipulation. Employee manipulation means that someone at the company uses one or more tactics to control someone else.
How to Spot and Stop Manipulators
Manipulation is not good in business, as it does nothing to foster an environment of open communication and equality. In some instances, manipulators can indirectly challenge company objectives. For these reasons, managers should address manipulative behavior and stop it.
Observe the manipulator's behavior. Make a list of the ways you see him manipulating. Many different manipulation tactics are in a manipulator's arsenal, but according to George K. Simon, author of "In Sheep's Clothing," manipulating can involve selective inattention, shaming, playing victim, projecting blame, minimizing an event or situation, playing servant, seducing, lying, intimidating, making others feel guilty and trying to divert attention.
Continue your observations for at least a month, documenting everything you can and gathering other written records that show manipulation is occurring. Look through the documentation and records for trends, such as if the manipulation only seems to happen with certain co-workers or under certain stressors. Review company policies, job descriptions and project objectives to analyze the potential impact the manipulation could have on others and the company as a whole. Meet with the manipulative employee.
Point out all you have observed and recorded about her behavior. Ask if she is aware of how she is manipulating others. Manipulation often occurs as a defense mechanism, which means that some manipulators are not aware of how subtly they are coercing others and may need some examples of how their behavior is manipulative.
Give the manipulative person a chance to open up about why she behaves as she does. Talk with the manipulator about the problems her manipulation could cause.
I know I am better to stay away from this difficult person that you really can't have any kind of normal relationship with. Suggest an Article Correction. He says he wants to build my self esteem as I was in an abusive relationship for years yet he tears it down. They will, however, use that information against you, possibly sharing it with others in the firm. He source her off but got angry at her.
Point out disciplinary policies the company has for here manipulation and subsequent interpersonal and productivity issues. Answer only questions, not statements, from the manipulator. Forcing questions requires the manipulator to be more direct and reveal her true purpose or informational desire. Point out confrontational statements the manipulator may make in order to antagonize and get her way.
Offer an example of how she could rephrase the statement in a cooperative manner.
Draw a firm line between you and the manipulator. Stand your ground and do not waver, restating your position in a polite but no-nonsense manner.
Balogne, he was looking right down at me. Skip to main content. As long as I don't argue and am "humble" then things go smooth! This in no way excuses bullying behavior, but may help you consider the bully in a more equanimous light:. Manipulation Submitted by Kathleen on July 21, - 9:
Distance yourself from the manipulator if necessary to give both you and the manipulator a chance to re-evaluate the situation and brainstorm a solution. Inform the manipulative person that disciplinary actions will click taken for whatever issues the manipulation causes. Even if your company doesn't have a policy directly relating to manipulation, the company probably has one about challenging authority and insubordination.
Maintain a Cordial Relationship
Any at-will employee works under the assumption of a master-servant relationship, meaning that it is reasonable for the employer to expect the employee to behave in a way that benefits the goals of the company.
Enforce disciplinary actions against the manipulative employee. Terminate the employee if she reaches her limit on disciplinary actions.
How To Deal With Someone Who Emotionally Manipulates People
Wanda Thibodeaux is a freelance writer and editor based in Eagan, Minn. She has been published in both print and Web publications and has written on everything from fly fishing to parenting.
She currently works through her business website, Takingdictation. Skip to main content. Things Needed Company handbook Records of business activities and employee behavior. How to Deal with Them? Suggest an Article Correction.