She Found Another Guy
4 Reasons why you MUST encourage the girls you're dating to see other guys
21 Aug I just started dating a girl I really like. We are definitely very invested in each other , but she's already saying she's not ready to be exclusive, etc. Has told me she is going on other dates (I know one of the guys, actually). So far it's been fine, I haven't really let on that it bugs me a lot, although there was some. Dating a girl who you know is dating other guys is a fertile breeding ground for insecure thoughts to pop into your head that just don't exist if you're in an exclusive relationship: “Am I as good as him?” “What if she likes him more?” “Am I as big as him?” (Don't pretend like you don't care). Realising these insecurities and. Regardless of what she tells you, you want to assume that there are other people in the equation and proceed as such. If she's an attractive girl, there will always be some flotsam and jetsam in the vicinity, no matter how much she is into you. A verbal commitment or even marriage is no way to guarantee that she will not.
She was beautiful, intelligent, funny, cool, and a sexual dynamo. And she was mine. Or so I thought…. Sure, that made all the difference. I felt SO much better. Partly because I was terrified of losing her, but also because I wanted to see just how it would play out.
Despite what my original misgivings, it turned out to be a smart decision. Allowing her to see other guys gives you the space to see other girls. This means you go out, flirt and play, make out, muck around, and not even think twice The Girl I Like Is Dating Other Guys getting in trouble. It will also help you avoid getting needy. The fastest way to kill any potential relationship is to take all the tension out of it.
Realising these insecurities and having them hit you in the face every time you see her means you have to confront them and deal with them, rather than running from them. In fact, do the opposite. Download your FREE copy The Girl I Like Is Dating Other Guys Seduction Community Sucks now and get in-field videos, subscriber-only articles, and exclusive podcasts delivered directly to your inbox.
Seduction Community Sucks is your page kick-start to becoming the kind of Man that makes women go weak at the knees. Get your FREE copyas well as access to other subscriber-only articles, podcasts, and video footage, now. These is dynamite Leigh!!! Just you could show us these point of view so explosive, crazy and true… I send you a big huges to all the guys here. Once it has grounded perfectly then set boundaries and encourage her to have fun but not with other horny horses around.
With productive, smart and positive people only. If you want to date around remain single and rather go for escorts, prostitutes, strippers etc. Not quite understand what you want to tell us. This is a good article and it is clear that all women must experience various relationships before marrying. We are in the 20th century! I was thinking about this exactly topic since a while. What you think about this?
I'm Sure She's Seeing Another Dude
The hippies had it right. Free love, without trying to control and possess the other is so much lighter, freer, happier than this modern concept of airtight relationships, where the other person has zero room to breathe.
Osho has a great talk about this on youtube where he basically says if you really love somebody, you give them total freedom. You give them privacy. The world is in big need of change with the way people approach love and relationships.
Do you have a link to that Osho video? From my perspective prostitution is what most wives and girlfriends partake in without realizing.
He is completely right. If someone is into you, telling them to date others is a slap in the face and very wrong. I feel sorry for you that you think anybody would need to do this. Multi dating is Neediness in itself. Are we not strong enough to go into a connection with out a back up?
I disagree with this post.
I find it as an excuse of trying to come up with a different approach to being polygamous indirectly. If you want a woman to keep seeing other males players, womanisers, man stealers who could potentially take your woman for a ride, follow this post! A bit of insecurity can secure your relationship, no insecurity at all can make your relationship insecurity and exposured to the public for manipulation.
I broke up with my GF a month ago or so because I was not comfortable with the relationship anymore. She was really hurt about that because she was really into me but she was not giving me space to live my life. News from the field…so, I shared this article on my facebook.
And received a response from a very perceptive chick. It seems to be saying: If this is the case, then the next question is: If what you are seeking is safety and security BEFORE you can feel intimate with someone, then this article may just piss you off or seem like a bunch of selfish, bullshit.
What does intimacy mean? It means sharing real desires and emotions with another. What if instead of waiting until I feel secure in the relationship before I let out the REAL me, I let out the real me all the time in all my relationships? Would I still feel the need to seek exclusivity, that is, to make this one and only person responsible for my sense of security?
Why should I burden her with this responsibility, which, ultimately she is doomed to fulfill because only I am responsible for how I feel and how I engage my world?
Your blog is good for fantasies. I mean, I get it. If she dating other guys and all she cared about was some sort of sexual relationship while she dated other guys or was looking for someone else for a relationship, that would have been fine.
And when you do as Leigh suggests, it has the effect of preempting any ideas of exclusivity or ownership or possessiveness. Relationships are fixed, static, complete. You are now free to do just one thing: But if you keep labels and arbitrary rules out of it, you still strive to seduce one another, to inspire and elevate one another and make your lover shine.
This is what dogs do actually. Dogs are not picky. This issue is not in the article and It ought to be. Men, I am not talking about randy boys, are picky and the ladies know, that they have better keep men interest otherwise men will kill the relationship and hunt for another equally hot babe. Hunters take the best. Less picky people eats road kills. Men dates like Cheetah. Just because an average lady is on the loose and available does not mean men have to pull.
Men hunts for shoal of ladies and do the romantic maths, narrow them to at least three and go for the kill.
Failure is expected but the hit rate is good. Here is the snag. Ladies are not complete idiots as some of us will have others believe. If you hunt like this, the ladies you get are worth their weight in gold, they too do not take nonsense.
It is up to you. Would you rather drive ten minis or an X Class? The beauty of it is, the only quality item on earth you can own without breaking bank is a quality woman.
So if she avoids the topic about being exclusive or committed, you should be alerted. Assuming it does work out good how do you know if you like one person more and want to spend more time? They finally had a heart to heart and she felt comfortable.
Look at it, to cure your neediness, we are told to date multiple ladies, dating multiple ladies happens to exposed the bane of relationships—insecurity.
Develop your mind, read wide and develop high taste. You have done it before, you can do it again and again and again so no rash manner, no insecurity that you lack class, parental love that you have to keep dogs like relationships to be The Man.
No, not at all. It is not what men do. You just have to find them. Assuming it does work out good how do you know if you like one person more and want to spend more time?
My girlfriends laugh because I keep saying I need to find one for myself. I literally sat in a coffee shop today that was full of beautiful Asian men and just blushed into my book haha. I actually find them unapproachable and feel that the rejection from an Asian man would be the most serious sort of rejection.
Overcoming the feeling associated with these insecurities: You have to become the kind of guy who can bring himself happiness, excitement and fulfillment independently read article her.
He has to be selfish and give himself these things before he can give to anyone else. But I feel like there are more things we can do to confront and deal with these insecurities.
What are your thoughts Leigh? There is an irony here on which any guy can contend. When you said that, somewhere, an alpha male is just The Girl I Like Is Dating Other Guys who has complete conviction in what he is doing then it can be a person who has belief in monogamous relationship.
Same way if someone wants to sleep with many then its alright for him too? And why do we men fuss over women so much. Take each of them as they come.
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For some you might have to adjust a little, for others they will do the same. In my opinion, if you wait for right circumstances to commit you will never be able to. This article might clear it up: This is hypocritical and stupid.
Essentially NONE, the only difference is that one behaves knowingly and the other one has his methods taught from an early age.